Goals, goals, goals.......This weekend served up more thrills in the most open season in decades and three four-goal scorelines plus some huge results for the top of the table sides. Leicester ended this weekend top of the league by virtue of having not been a complete fucking shambles at any point so far (even when womped 5-2 by Arsenal they still looked pretty good). Man United continue their sloth-like "run" in the top four and City and Arsenal just did what City and Arsenal do, lose to sides they really should be beating and racking up injuries like ligaments are going out of fashion. Meanwhile Chelsea seem to have woken up somewhat and are looking to scrape as many dire victories as they can to ensure they're no-where near the relegation zone come the new year...........
Watford
Vs Manchester United: Own goal claims all three for dour
United...............
Winning
any game after a spate of injuries is always good regardless of the
nature of that win although, curiously, all bar one (Martial) of
United's injuries could be judged to have actually improved
their team. Given all the vitriol been thrown around about United
essentially being there for the taking, as Arsenal showed, it seems
very few teams are up for actually taking them. They sit second
having only lost two games (only Leicester and Spurs have lost less)
and in a good position to continue this form throughout the congested
Christmas period. Watford boast a busy, if not necessarily potent,
strike-team in Ighalo and Deeney and it was hoped that the two of
them would get stuck into the United defence and wreak havoc.
The
reality was something different. Watford started meekly in the first
half and really only had one chance on goal, which was missed badly
by Ighalo. Starting meek in attack is okay as it affords them a
chance to play themselves back into the game, starting meekly in
defence only costs goals. United pulled ahead in the 11th
minute when Depay was left totally unmarked and his crisp volley from
Herrera's cross left Gomes no chance whatsoever. United went into
cruise control from then on and the half ended 1-0. Watford came out
from the break a changed team and set about playing they way they
should have from the start. Were it not for the brilliance of De Gea,
United would've been 2-1 down long before Rojo tripped Ighalo in the
box in the 87th
minute. Deeney stepped up and finally put the ball past De Gea.
United jolted back into life and pressed but five minutes left them
almost nothing to work with. They got the winner courtesy of Deeney
when Lingard's fine shot was saved by Gomes and Schweinstieger fired
the ball back into the box. Deeney could do nothing as the ball
cannoned off him and into the net. United's streak is impressive,
even more so considering how badly they're playing, and they will
seek to continue it against Leicester which is sure to be one of the
most improbable 1st
Vs 2nd
matches in recent history. Watford will seek to finally get some
rewards for their hard work against a rudder-less Villa next week.
Chelsea
Vs Norwich: Off form Costa rescues three points for relieved
Chelsea......
It's
amusing to think that Norwich actually went into this match above the
current league champions. Chelsea broke a three-game losing streak
with a solitary goal and the sigh of relief at the final whistle was
so strong it blew out windows for miles around London. A season
Norwich would've been delighted to leave Stamford Bridge by this
scoreline but they entered with the smell of a win or, least, a draw.
They did themselves no favours with some horrendous marking and left
with neither. Chelsea, and Costa in particular, will not look back on
this performance with too much fondness, had Norwich defended better
or had more teeth in attack Chelsea would have been in serious
trouble. They will also view the two glaring misses in the first half
by Costa as a sign that another alternative may be required for the
out-of-form striker as Remy and Falcao clearly are not up to the
task.
However,
with silver linings being what they are, there was one high point
from tonight and that's the form of Hazard seems to be rising. Today
he looked like a man who's woken up from a long-term coma in which he
was stuck in a vivid nightmare. Even considering the lack of any type
of pressure from Norwich he can look at this match as one of his
better performances this season. Yet it was Costa who conspired to
squander all the good work of his team-mates. Picked out expertly by
Pedro, Costa was left unmarked on the penalty spot and promptly fired
over. He was then put through one-on-one and he dithered until
dispossessed by Ruddy. That one sent the Chelsea bench into a
maelstrom of anger and it was no surprise that his number was being
prepared on the 64th
minute when he scored. Fabregas took a free-kick quickly and Norwich,
slow all day, were totally unable to deal with the pace and Costa
found the top corner to seal all three points. It's a slow
progression for Chelsea so far but they surely are in a much better
position with three points and Hazard back to some semblance of his
best. They take on Spurs next week and will need to produce something
better to stand a hope of stealing a march on the top spots. Norwich
will lick their wounds and prepare for an even more wounded Arsenal
next week.
Everton
Vs Aston Villa: Toffees chew Villa up and spit them out..............
Everton
are a team reborn as of late. Something in their team DNA has clicked
and it's producing a series of performances that are just downright
scary at times. Here they completely obliterated Villa by half-time
and looked very sharp and collected whilst doing so. Granted they
were playing against Aston Villa; a team so disjointed and lost it
wouldn't be surprising of it turned out they were being out-scored by
their training dummies. Villa have the lowest goals for account in
the league now (10) and it's easy to see why. There's absolutely zero
fight left his this squad and Garde is going to need a miracle to
restore some faith to this sorry bunch. Maybe it's down to a solid
starting XI. Everton's (for the first time in a long while) picks
itself. Deulofeu, when he stays on his feet, and Barkley have been
turning in some excellent performances and they're really starting to
play with some flair and style. Villa replaced three lost players
(Delph, Benteke and Vlaar) with thirteen other ones and it's hard to
see what any of them are supposed to be doing, let alone how they fit
together.
Villa
were 3-0 down at half time and all the goals came from Everton simply
being allowed to pass and run their way down the pitch almost to the
goal itself. The first was a Deulofeu shot that Guzan parried for
Barkley to slot home unopposed. The second was a Coleman cross that
Lukaku met, under no pressure again, with a glanced header into the
far corner. The third was another spilled ball by Guzan, this time
from a challenge with Kone, and Barkley, yet again, slotted home with
no resistance. The fourth came after a period of Villa playing
somewhat better in the second half when Barkley and Deulofeu simply
passed their way through the middle and opened up the goal for Lukaku
to net his second and the games fourth. It's funny to compare two
clubs that have such similarities in size, finances and supporter
base and see such glaring differences in the teams. And it's purely
down to management. Here's how Everton have kept it together while
Villa have shit it all out:
- Big and talented young Belgian centre-forward: Villa sold Benteke, Everton broke the bank to keep Lukaku.
- Talented and hyped young English player: Barkley ran the show today while Grealish looked out of his depth.
- Young winger from Barca: Traore barely makes the bench, Deulofeu is in brilliant form and has even stopped the diving!
- Ageing veterans: Barry, Osman, Jagielka still look fired up. Lescott, Richardson, Cole look wrecked. Let's face it, when you're looking to Richardson to help you out, you're fucked.
- Celtic full-back: Coleman is excellent both in attack and defence.....Villa have Alan Hutton.
Newcastle
Vs Leicester City: The Foxes go top with an inspired destruction of
Newcastle.....
Look
who's laughing now? If Ranieri was to conduct the rest of this season
like that scene in Father Ted where Ted wins an award and uses his
acceptance speech to bitterly settle scores with everyone who annoyed
him, could anyone blame him? It's probably the only thing that could
make me like him more. This game was very much a show between two
managers on the opposite sides of the spectrum, McClaren cannot do
anything right, Ranieri cannot do anything wrong. Leicester delivered
their most complete victory of the season and Newcastle delivered
their worst one. Newcastle failed to register one single shot on
target and were amazingly fortunate to get to almost half-time before
conceding.
The
goal was well signposted. Vardy had had numerous opportunities to
score but somehow contrived to scuff most of them before Ulloa burned
past Mbemba (this was to be a recurring theme) and his cut-back pass
left Vardy with little more to do then find the target, which he did.
He almost racked up a second, after the break, when he ghosted past
Mbemba and smashed the ball off the bar. The second was not too far
off when, in the 62nd
minute, whipped in a superb cross for Ulloa to head home. While the
goal (and the cross) were excellent, rarely does marking get so lax.
It was almost as if the Newcastle players were at home watching the
highlights themselves. With Newcastle waving white flags Leicester
went into a kind of auto-pilot and even took off Vardy for Okazaki.
He then scored the third when he bundled in (seemingly against his
will) Simpson's parried shot in the 83rd.
Boos rang around the ground at full-time, as they'd done at half-time
and McClaren must surely be feeling the heat, any more performances
like this and he'll certainly not see 2016 as Newcastle manager. A
difficult away match to Palace awaits next week. A win there would
surely ease a shit-load of the weight. Leicester will seek to cement
their top spot against Manchester united next week and Vardy will
seek to continue the form that's seen him compared to the likes of
Batistuta.
Southampton
Vs Stoke City: The walking dead claim a major scalp................
Stoke
are a peculiar team. When Hughes took over from Pulis he'd inherited
a team that had a rod of steel through the middle but little else to
make them shine other than some pacey wingers. They played a direct,
physical form of football (some might call it “fighting”) and
were often easily found out at times. Hughes' main task was to add
flair to the team whilst retaining that iron will to not concede
goals. It appears, from today's match anyway, that he's some way
towards the promised land. There are few teams that can shut up shop
at 1-0 and make it work. Stoke are absolutely one of those teams. It
also helped that Soton were curiously off the boil today and played
like they had lead weights in their socks.
The
first half hour of this match were virtually all Stoke and their goal
was a real team effort. Shaquiri, who is really starting to show the
class that made him such a darling at Inter, pelted down the right
flank and passed in Arnautovic. He then then played the ball across
again to Pieters who helped the ball into the path of Krkic,
unmarked, who flicked the ball home at the near post. The half hour
of domination ended with Afalley having as hot cleared off the line,
yet it should have been more as both Arnautovic and Shaquiri had
opportunities to score but wasted them. Stoke shut up shop in the
second half and hit Soton on the counter. That steel is now augmented
with the skill do be able to do this effectively. Soton pretty much
owned the ball for the second half and managed to do nothing with it.
They notched up only one shot on target the entire game. Koeman was
rightly pissed at his team afterwards claiming that he “didn't
recognise any of them”. He'll need them showing from now on because
Soton have a tough run of fixtures coming up to the new year starting
with Manchester City next week. Stoke will travel to Sunderland and
this result will surely buoy them to three points there as well.
Swansea
Vs Bournemouth: Two goal lead squandered as the Swans claw themselves
back in...
Things
aren't going so well for Bournemouth right now. They came into this
match on the back of a five match losing streak and the urge for them
to take the fight to a Swansea team that seems almost devoid of fight
recently was palpable. And they did just that. Rifling home two goals
in side the first 26 minutes. Trouble is, it took only half that time
for them to piss away the two goal lead. It's difficult to draw
parallels between Bournemouth's play and the result that come of it.
They play with a confidence and verve and yet haven't a bean to show
for it. The only positive for them today is that Swansea, in clawing
back a two goal deficit, also showed up their own deficiencies. They
are woefully short on confidence and have an array of first-team
players who have all lost their form completely and have just been
phoning it in. The play hasn't been this bad since before Laudrup was
sacked.
The
match started off quite badly too. Bournemouth's first came after ten
minutes courtesy of some truly awful defending. Stanislas had overrun
a nice pass to him and it left a simple clearance for Bartley.
Unfortunately he cleared the ball straight into Sung-Yeung. The ball
re-bounded to Stanislas who crossed low across the box for King to
slot home. Swansea woke up and forced two good saves from Federici
but left themselves wide open for the second; Arter receiving the
ball from deep and picking out Richie in the box. Richie had enough
time to literally stand on the fucking ball and wait for someone to
run in through the centre. It was Gosling whose first-time shot was
dead top corner and the boos that rang around the home stadium were
defending in the aftermath of the second goal. It must've filtered
through to the players as they pulled one back less than 90 seconds
later. Ayew with some deft footwork in box after Shelvey found him
with a through ball. He controlled the ball with his right foot and
back-heeled it in with his left and, suddenly, Swansea were back in
it. They poured on the pressure but it was a contentious penalty that
helped level things when Francis was judged to have tripped Ayew in
the box. Replays showed that he actually tripped over his own feet.
Shelvey stepped up and put away the equaliser to save some face for
Monk, but not much. Swansea will need to step up their performances
and next weeks meeting with an in-form Liverpool is not an ideal
match to start. Bournemouth will not be happy with their next match
either as they host Everton.
West
Brom Vs Arsenal: Loss highlights the familiar injury crisis at
Arsenal......
Here
we go again. A mad rash of injuries followed by a huge dip in form
and some stuttering losses to teams they really shouldn't be losing
to if they consider themselves title contenders, same old Arsenal.
For a team who's the very embodiment of exciting football, Arsenal
can be quite a boring team to write about. It's a very Arsenal thing
to lose by two goals when the opposition only had one shot. But it
truly was an evening where literally everything that could go wrong,
did. Arsenal took 72% possession, restricted West Brom to only one
shot on target (which led to a goal), hit the post, scored an own
goal, missed a penalty and suffered two more long-term injuries, one
of them to a crucial player. So not a good night then. For West Brom
all the guff about the blunt style of football served up by Pulis
were stemmed by the result and some fine attacking displays,
particularly by McClean and Rondon.
Not
that Arsenal did themselves any fucking favours tonight. Despite
having nine first-team injuries going into this game, they still
boast a legion of talent that Pulis could only dream of. The trouble
is the talent didn't perform. They lost Coquelin after half an hour
to a knee injury sustained in a tackle with Yacob and Arteta came on
in his place. How Wenger must be wishing he turned to Flamini
instead...Alexis had come close with a fierce 20 yard strike that was
well saved but it was yet another perfectly delivered cross from Ozil
that unlocked the massed Bromich defence. Giroud was left unmarked
and his header was as simple as could be. Seven minutes later Bromich
equalised through their own set-piece and Arsenal defended it every
single bit as badly as Bromich did theirs and the result was the
same. Morrison deftly pinging the ball across and into the net. Five
minutes later McClean beasted Bellerin, not for the first or last
time, and slung in a cross. Arteta was there to bungle the ball into
his own net. He would then sum up his evening by getting injured
twenty minutes after coming on. Arsenal poured forward and Campbell
had a great chance to score from six yards but took it like a 95
year-old MS sufferer. Then Alexis was bundled over in the box and up
stepped Cazorla to rescue at least a point and make the game not a
complete shambles. He slipped in his run up and ballooned the ball
over the bar. Arsenal will now limp onwards to Norwich after a
mid-week CL game and West Brom will happily accept the early
Christmas gift and hope for another at West Ham next week.
Manchester
City Vs Liverpool: The Akloppalypce is back...and it's hungry!!!
In
the words of Pellegrini afterwards, “it was a complete disaster”.
Never before have City played with such a sense of apathy and lack of
conviction. Expect maybe for a few weeks ago at Spurs where they were
also beaten 4-1. The last time Demichelis had also started in
defence........ Anyway, to lay the blame solely at the feet of one
defender after such an awful team outing would be unfair. Of all the
players involved only Hart and Aguero could hold their heads up by
the end. No team can defend like this and expect to win. Mangala and
Demichelis played like men who had never seen a football before; let
alone each other. Sagna was porous on the right hand side and was
bypassed many times far too easily. The defensive frailties weren't
helped by Fernandihno being left on the bench. An excellent midfield
screen he was sorely missed and his replacement, Fernando, was a
virtual bystander. Further up there were more problems as Toure, who
barely broke into a jog the entire game, and Navas, useless even at
the best of times, both put in shifts so bad that they were both
hooked at half-time.
There
were two teams playing, however, and while much of the focus will be
on how bad City played, Liverpool deserved this win. They were
excellent from front to back. They pressed and harried the shit out
of City and would've won through sheer force of will were the skilful
moments not there. But they were there and then some. Liverpool
looked like scoring every time they went forward. Eight minutes in,
Firmino dashed to the byline and punted a cross in that Mangala,
after forgetting how his legs worked, could only put into his net.
Not a fitting start for one of the most expensive defenders in the
world. The second came fifteen minutes later when Firmino latched
onto a misplaced header form Demichelis and sent in a ball for
Coutinho to tap in form eight yards out. The third came nine minutes
later when Countihno had a shot roughly blocked by Hart and Can put
in a backheel that cut out the entire City defence and left Coutihno
one-on-one, he choose to dink the ball across to Firmino to tap into
an empty net. The Liverpool press was proving too much for City and
they looked destined to end the half scoreless when, one minute from
the break, the press eased enough for Aguero to cut inside Leiva and
curl a super shot in from 25 yards out. The second waned from the
breathless pace of the first one but there were still moments of
magic in it when Skrtel got the ball, let it bounce, turned and
smashed a volley home to secure the points. Although the points were
secure from 30 minutes in, such was the display from Liverpool. They
will hope to replicate this time and time again and have a dispirited
Swansea to try out next, whereas City will have to cope with
Southampton next.
Spurs
Vs West Ham: Spurs purring midfield puts the Hammers to the
sword......
While
no-one is touting Spurs to be able to challenge for one of the top
spots this season, any more of this and it'll be hard to look past
them. West Ham have made a name for themselves when playing away and
the expectation was that both teams would attempt to out-gun one
another to see who is left standing. They racked up twelve shots on
target today, eight of which were repelled by Adrian, the only West
Ham player to actually show up tonight. Even then, he was totally at
fault for Spurs' third goal. The Spurs high press worked a treat and
Wet Ham had to answer to it. They certainly couldn't look towards
their striker Carroll to bail them out. To a man, West Ham were the
inferior team and turned over possession an alarming amount of times
under pressure from Spurs.
While
West Ham started somewhat brightly, this “feel-good” period
lasted a scant twenty minutes until Kane put home Spurs first in
after he rolled away from Jenkinson and thumped the ball home. The
second was a textbook near-post run from Alderweireld to leap above
Carroll and head home. Sours could be aggrieved that they didn't
score more in the first half, and they could be pleased that
Kayoute's overhead kick crashed off the crossbar rather than into the
net. The second half was a continuation of the first. Spurs pressed
high and peppered the West Ham goal. The third goal was a calamity
when Tomkins forgot who he was a tried to play out form the back. His
pass went straight to Erikson who fed Kane who thumped his shot off
Reid and under Adrian who really should've done better. Then Walker
showcased himself in quite good and bad lights inside of a three
minutes spell. He surged forward in the 84th
minute and scored using the outside of his foot when set up by
Heung-min. Then he made not one, but two glaring errors when
Alderweireld hit the ball back to him inside his own half. His pass
was awful and intercepted by Jelavic and he was completely sold by
Lanzini to allow space for the consolation goal. Spurs take on
Chelsea next and it'll be another scalp for Spurs to collect this
season having missed out on Arsenal last week. West Ham will need to
get their shit together for West Brom, fresh off a rousing defeat of
Arsenal.
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