Well that
was some week. It was a good one for the nutty bets, with almost
every top teams losing points and the ones that didn't somehow
looking like they wanted to. Leicester are now top by two and how
Arsenal must be ruing those dropped points to West Brom and Norwich
and they nearly added Sunderland to that list this week too. Man City
were torn apart by Stoke in a game that resembled a game of FIFA
that's been allowed to run non-stop for 10 or 15 years and now makes
no sense, Chelsea were well fucking beaten by Bournemouth with a
result that sent howls of laughter around the league and Liverpool
had “one of those days” against Newcastle. Man United were the
only other consistency at the top but, unfortunately, that's just
them being consistently shit and boring and they were very lucky to
escape with a point when West Ham ran them ragged. Here's the
breakdown of this weeks action:
Stoke
Vs Manchester City: The walking dead claim a major scalp as City go
brainless......
There was one question on everyone's (who wasn't a City fan) lips
after the early game concluded: City really can't be missing Kompany
this badly, can they? Granted they were without Toure and Aguero too
but they've a plethora of attacking talent to replace him and they've
not had much trouble racking up the score recently. It's the losses
at the back that really seem to be killing City right now. Without
Kompany they don't just seem nervous, they seem lost. It's as if the
defence literally cannot remember how to play football without him.
The malaise spreads further forward too as the bewilderingly awful
Fernando continues to get game time. He's one of the purely useless
players City have in their squad, completely unable to play his
position in every regard. None of this is to detract from just how
well Stoke, Shaquiri and Arnautovic in particular, played. There's a
saying in Boxing: “You can only fight the guy in front of you”
and Stoke had to contend with this feeble facsimile of City and they
duly shredded it to pieces.
City conceded after seven minutes but the result had been long
signposted even by that early marker. Shaquiri was given acres of
space and no pressure was put on him by the useless Fernando.
Shaquiri simply waltzed past him, headed for the byline and slung his
cross in around the badly out of position Kolorov. Arnautovic's run
was not checked by Demichelis and his finish left Hart no chance.
The second arrived eight minutes later when Cameron held off Kolorov
on the right flank and his ball inside to Shaquiri was skillfully
turned around his hapless marker, Fernando again, he sprinted
goal-wards and threaded a sublime through ball for Krkic. Krkic
missed it but Arnautovic was to his right and the ball reached him,
he finished it inside the left post. Half an hour later, Arnautovic
squandered his Hat-trick chance when Whelan was put down the left
flank thanks to some skill by Krkic and his ball was straight onto
Arnautovic's head, eight yards out and completely unmarked. His ball
beat Hart completely but drifted just an Inch wide of the post.
Kolorov hit the post with a rare foray forward but that was as good
as City got for the whole game. Just before the break, Shaqiri put
Arnautovic through one-on-one only for his foot to slip just as he
pulled the trigger and the ball smashed off the post. The second half
brought more of the same with Arnautovic, Shaquiri and Krkic all
missing gild edged chances to tot up the score. City were lucky with
2-0 and really should've been humiliated in this game. Their only
good news will be that their opponents next week, Swansea, will lack
the cutting edge Stoke showed although anything less than a win
against one of the most hapless team right now will send alarm bells
ringing at the Etihad. Stoke will hope for more of the same against
West Ham next week.
Arsenal
Vs Sunderland: The Injury ravaged Gunner scrape a badly needed
win......
Don't
let the scoreline fool you, this game could've, very easily, ended up
so much worse for Arsenal. Arsenal jumped from nervy to sluggish to
exceptional within the same minute at times. The nature of this win
will not leave many happy, but the fact that Arsenal are second now
with a win will soothe many complaints. For all the “walking
wounded” talk surrounding Arsenal they were still able to field a
very good team today with Oxlade-Chamberlain back and Campbell
playing very well. Ramsey saw the return to central midfield that
he's always wanted (and where he plays his best), and thanks to
injuries he'll be there for a while at least, it remains to be seen
how much balance this Arsenal team have with nine first-team players
out long-term. Sunderland lined up 4-5-1 with an onus on clogging up
the midfield and not allowing Ozil any space whatsoever. They
succeeded with the first point, failed with the second.
Yet it was Sunderland who looked, at the beginning at least, the far
more threatening. Four minutes in Whatmore fed a pass to Borini that
checked off the entire defence. Borini's shot was well saved by Cech.
Whatmore again fed Borini, five minutes later, and while he shot this
time was better it was still well saved by Cech. The feeling amongst
the home crowd was when Sunderland would score, not if. Then Ozil
conjured up his usual piece of magic for his twelfth assist of the
season. Ramsey fed Giroud who laid it back to Ozil who swerved in a
super inside ball that still left Campbell with a lot to do. He was
more than capable and his finish was calm and precise. The sense of
relief in the stadium was huge. It was to swiftly replaced by the
usual sour atmosphere just before half-time when Koscielny stupidly
fouled Whatmore near the sidelines. M'Vila sent in a curling ball
that missed the intended targets at the near post, then Giroud threw
in his leg and hit the ball top corner off his shin. It was a very
Arsenal thing indeed. The second half kicked off with much of the
same when Fletcher fired a low shot that Cech palmed out and the
resultant corner was almost prodded home but for a stunning goal line
save. Then Arsenal began to assert themselves and not a moment too
fucking soon either. Again Ozil pulled the strings near the right
side of the Sunderland box and Monreal ran through the defence. He
passed the ball to Ramsey who floated in a ball that perfectly picked
out the run of Giroud. He got in front of his marker and his diving
header left Pantillimon no chance. With Walcott on for the last
twenty minutes and a goal ahead, Arsenal had a sense of impetus.
Giroud had a ball cleared off the line by Yedlin. Then, just before
the end, a series of ricochets led to Ramsey stabbing the ball home
from three yards out to confirm the three points. Arsenal have a
mid-week game that they need to win and then they have Villa next
weekend. Sunderland will take heart from their performance here and
will hope for more against Watford.
Manchester
United Vs West Ham: Boring, boring United limp to their sixth
0-0.........
No Rooney, no problem. United don't seem to need him listing around
the pitch like a ship with a hole in the hull scuffing chance after
chance to be boring. It seems the rest of the players are more than
capable of stinking up the place all on their own as the boos that
ringed Old Trafford attested to at full time. United racked up 21
shots with only that solitary “1” being on target. Think about
that for a second ,at home, Man united could only muster one shot
that managed to reach the keeper in 90 minutes. Against a massed
defence and an opposition that never ventured past the half way line,
you'd forgive that and chalk it up to the other team spoiling play
because they were more afraid of losing than attempting to win. But
the Hammers didn't sit back, they took the game to United on numerous
occasions and Moses really should've scored when he was put through
one-on-one after Blind took his name to heart and passed straight to
Noble. Thankfully De Gea has read it and got out in time to stop
Moses and preserve their sixth 0-0 this season......SIXTH?! Can I
remind you that there's only been 15 fucking games so far?!?!?!
The signs really were there from the start that this game would take
on the guise of all the previous ones. United lined up in a 4-4-1-1
formation with Fellaini just behind Martial for his aerial “prowess”
and his own brand of chaos. Unfortunately it's not the type of chaos
that causes defences to scatter like frightened birds but rather the
type that ends up in highlight reels to the soundtrack of mocking
laughter and cries of “can you believe they paid nearly 30 million
for him!! He's shit!!”. The lack of goals at United gets decidedly
highlighted when all the players they've loaned out keep scoring
goals. Since October, Hernandez has slotted home 11 times, the entire
United team have managed 10. This is not to put a damper on West Ham
who had, by far, more chances and the more clear-cut chances to score
and really should've done so. Bilic will look back on the losses of
Lanzini and Moses (pulled up in this match) and how the loss of such
talent will affect his teams goalscoring. From today, it looks like
they'll struggle to score. But the Hammers defended well with Reid
putting in his best shift ever in what was, essentially, a “Plan B”
West ham team with over a third of their players gone. Nevertheless a
point (at old trafford no less) was welcome and the Hammers will take
on Stoke next weekend in a game that will certainly not end up 0-0.
United will travel to Bournemouth who will anxious to rack up their
second big scalp in as many games...
Southampton
Vs Aston Villa: Mis-firing saints hand dying Villa a point.........
A
broken watch is still right twice a day as the saying goes and it
seems a broken team can still cause an upset or two. Especially this
season which is the most open in probably a decade and the silly
sauce is being consumed in bulk quantities. Going by past
performances this season, Soton should've racked up a cricket score
against a team that has had the will to live kicked out of them and
languish at the bottom of the table and are sure favourites to be
relegated. Soton were on a three game losing streak prior to this
game and may have taken Villa a little too lightly, understandable
given that they annihilated Villa 6-1 in this fixture last season
with Mane racking up the quickest hat-trick in history in the
process. Today, however, they encountered two obstacles: a stunning
lack of finishing and a Villa with a little more backbone than we're
used to seeing.
Still
Soton should've been one up inside the first minute when Mane cut
back a pass to Tadic only for him to blaze the shot over from less
than 12 yards out. Then came a series of errant shooting that could
only be described as downright sloppy with Pelle, Wanyama and Mane
himself either heading wide or ballooning shots over. Fonte failed to
score but at least he got his shot on target and it had to be cleared
off the line. Soton were cutting through Villa with ease in every
part of the pitch, in defence Villa were all over the place and the
midfield seemed to have contracted a lethal allergy to tackling. It
was a full half-hour before Villa had their first attempt with
Vertout crossed for Gestede 15 yards out. He duly scuffed it. Then,
after yet more fluffed Soton attempts, Villa scored. Lescott decided
to not just be a source of some slack defending but to instead take
advantage of some and got the ball in after a good Vertout corner.
The goal galvanised the spirit of the team and they began putting on
a more polished performance, while still riding their luck. Soton had
an excellent chance to equalise when Juanmi was put through
one-on-one yet Guzan saved. But Villa could not hold out and Romeu
stabbed home a Ward-Prowse corner in the 73rd
minute. The match petered out to the end with yet more scuffed
chances and wasted opportunities but, in fairness, neither team
really deserved to win this one. Soton will hope to sort out their
finishing issues by the time they visit Palace next week and Villa
will be hoping Arsenal are feeling just as generous when they come to
town next weekend.
Swansea
Vs Leicester: The Foxes cement top spot by crushing the
Swans..........
For once, the story was not about Vardy. Despite the obvious headline
fodder resulting from his inability to equal the all-time goal
scoring streak most of the coverage centred on, deservedly, the
“other” Leicester player: Mahrez. In a rampant Leicester display
he was easily the standout player. Him and Vardy now have 24 goals
this season on their own, Manchester United have 20. They've built a
team solely around the concept of pace and finishing and it has paid
dividends for them. They utterly tore Swansea apart and the 3-0
scoreline (2-0 at half-time) is hugely flattering. The Swans are now
firmly in the midst of a crisis and the vultures must be circling.
Including the cup, they've won only one game in their last twelve and
they've failed to score in eight of those. They've completely broken
down from front to back and seem unable to string more than three
passes together. They could've been 5-0 down by half-time today and
will reckon that only the pressure on Vardy to make it 12 in 12 that
stopped it from becoming a total drubbing.
Leicester
started it off five minutes in when a stupidly conceded corner
allowed Albrighton to serve in from the left, over the cluster at the
front post and Mahrez shaded Gomis to scuff it home. Vardy was
through one-on-one four minutes later but Fabianski closed the angle
down well and saved. The second goal came from another break forward
when Vardy laid the ball to the excellent Kante. His diagonal ball
found Mahrez who side-footed home. Swansea brought on Montero at
half-time and while it did restore some semblance of coherence to the
team it could not right the huge amounts of wrongs going on. Fifteen
minutes after the re-start Mahrez netted his hat-trick and put the
game beyond any doubt. Kante marauded forward and found Vardy just
outside the box. He eschewed his chance to shoot and instead passed
to Mahrez on his right who finished the ball into the bottom left.
Leicester are now two clear at the top and, with everyone just
beneath them having European commitments, they look set to remain
there. Although they're now embarking upon their “tough run” of
fixtures that will really see them distinguish themselves. They have
a dour Chelsea next though. Swansea will be looking for drastic
action between now and the January window and Monk may be leaving
soon. Another performance like this, against Manchester City, and
Monk will be the first casualty of their woeful campaign.
Watford
Vs Norwich: Hornets avenge old losses for three much-needed
points.....
Another team with a prolific (albeit slightly less so) strike team
partnership is Watford. In Deeney and Ighalo they have a duo that has
accounted for 14 of the 17 goals Watford have so far. Important is
too small a word. They've been firmly ensconced in mid table and that
just where they like it, watching from afar while the relegation
battle rips apart the teams below them. They've certainly got the
team to help them in that regard. While Norwich didn't exactly play
out of their skins today, Watford were all over them and the score
really should've been higher. Ighalo, in particular, could've had a
hat-trick as Norwich were completely unable to deal with him. Bassong
had a torrid time trying to contain Deeney and Ighalo gave him the
kind of afternoon that probably made him question if football is the
right career for him. Norwich are now in a bit of a bind having only
one win from their last ten games. The team they have is better than
that dismal run of form and if they don't start getting it together
they'll find themselves picked clean by the end of the season.
That all said, it was Norwich who started this game the better. After
half an hour they were on the back foot, their afternoon typified by
the sight of Tettey dicking around with the ball near his own box and
being dispossessed by Capoue. He charged back to try to win the ball
back and only succeeded in hauling down Ighalo in the box. Deeney
dispatched the penalty. Ighalo would himself find the net in the
dying moments of the game, ghosting past Bassong after being put in
by Deeney, after having a goal wrongly ruled out earlier. In an
unusual move, Neil decided to heap the criticism on certain players,
Brady for instance, and start complaining about the playing surface
rather than just admit to the fact that his team were outplayed.
He'll have to dig deeper for the excuses next week when they welcome
Everton and Watford will travel to Sunderland with hopes to three
more points.
West
Brom Vs Spurs: One apiece in a game of two halves........
Spurs have equalled a record today by going unbeaten since almost the
start of the season and it was due to some grit and the hands of
Lloris. Pulis teams have a knack for dogged defending and West Brom
are no different but it was interesting to see how they dealt with
the high press employed by Spurs. They weathered it, equalised and
then built up a head of steam which kept Spurs on the back foot for
most of the second half. Spurs are winning plaudits for the amount of
points they've amassed but not too many, they still wish to remain
under the radar while the four or five teams ahead of them wipe each
other out while Spurs contend with the Europa league fixtures. It was
hot and cold today for Spurs; here they failed to turn the sheer
amount of possession into more than one goal, yet they'll be pleased
with the stalwart manner in which they repelled the West Brom late
surge. West Brom will be pleased with the point and the recent
performances of some players, notably McClean and Rondon.
Spurs
were first to the scoresheet today with Alli latching onto a
Alderweireld diagonal long ball by running inbetween his tow markers
and volleying the ball through Myhill's legs. It was back and forth
for a bit when ,in the 39th,
some nice interplay between Sessegnon and Fletcher led to Fletcher
swinging in a cross for McClean to head home to notch his first West
Brom goal. The second half saw a West Brom going for the kill. Having
seen off Spurs' rivals two weeks ago they looked hungry for another
north London club scalp. Olsson forced Lloris into a ridiculous
fingertip save from six yards out while Rondon dithered too much in
the box and Walker slid clear. But West Brom will be happy knowing
they came to fight and found they could really mix it with the bigger
teams on their day. They've another big team to take on next week in
Liverpool and more of this kind of fight could see another upset at
Anfield. Spurs will seek to extend their record against Newcastle
next week.
Chelsea
Vs Bournemouth: Upset supreme as the plucky underdogs flog the dead
horse....
Oh
how this was too perfect for this league. In a season marked out by
the sheer lunacy of it's results, Chelsea losing to Bournemouth was
considered a step too far. There was no way this could occur, it was
just too crazy. But the indomitable fact remains, you cannot play
this badly and expect to win. And if Chelsea are considering
themselves unlucky and in a dire state, they need only look to the
victors today to see how things could be worse. Bournemouth came into
this on the back of a nine game winless streak and ravaged by
injuries to an almost Arsenal-like degree, no-one expected them to do
anything more than put up a fight and go down swinging. They walked
away with all three points. Surely this result points to a malaise in
Chelsea that runs far deeper than anyone could've guessed. While
complaints will pour in that Murray (only on the pitch for less than
two minutes) may have been offside when the cross came in the fact
remains that the cross should nvere have reached him .
Chelsea's
issue stem from a alack of drive to get forward and produce goals.
They've roughly half the number they had this time last season and
Costa has a third as many. Yet the goalscoring duties do not fall on
his shoulders alone, although the stunning lack of alternatives
certainly isn't helping matters. Hazard and Remy, his chief backup,
have yet to find the net at all this season, fuck even Falcao has
one. Finding it so difficult to score puts extra pressure on whenever
they go behind or are goalless coming towards the end of a game. They
laboured throughout this game and it took a while for Bournemouth to
build up the belief that they could actually win this. They gamely
held their own till half time, when Costa was subbed on, and had to
be smart to deal with the succession of crosses slung low into their
box. One touch and they were in, yet Bournemouth never stopped
hitting back. Their reward came in the 82nd
when Courtois flapped at Cook's cross and no-one picked up Murray who
headed in. Chelsea are now only three points off relegation and are
up against Leicester next who will hoping that Chelsea play this
badly next week. Bournemouth take this much-needed shot in the arm
for the visit of Manchester United a point or more from that and
their season will be well and truly turned around.
Newcastle
Vs Liverpool: The new Klopp order shown up by McClarens trailer park
boys...
Crunch
time for McClaren today and a game against a resurgent Liverpool was
not what he would've wanted. Klopp had gotten his team playing with
tenacity and verve in recent times and their mid-week destruction of
a full-strength Southampton team was the calm before the goal storm
in many people's eyes. So full credit must go to Newcastle, Wijnaldum
in particular, and McClaren for a gutsy win and a golden
get-out-of-jail-free card. Rumours circled before the game that he
had two matches to save his job. He only needed one. A different
result may have occurred had Moreno's 79th
minute volley stood as it was incorrectly ruled out for offside but
one poor decision does not a match make. Liverpool lacked the urge
going forward and mustered only one shot on target the entire game.
Mind
you, one shot on target was all Newcastle managed too and it only
occurred in extra time. But it went in and that's the important part.
While a modicum of bad luck could be levelled for the first goal, it
was a delightful piece of skill that produced the second and
Liverpool can have no other complaints other than they were
second-best. The fault lay mainly in the tactics. Milner and Ibe were
fielded as wingers and while Ibe strengths lie on the flanks, Milners
does not. He's much better played through the centre. Benteke looked
too isolated too frequently without the sublime service offered to
him by Countinho and Sturridge, both out through injury. This meant
long balls, and lots of them but Newcastle couldn't just relax.
They'll walk away knowing that, while they dealt with everything sent
their way, a better finisher would've slaughtered them today for some
of the errant passing on display. The own goal came in the 69th
minute when Newcastle had been asserting themselves since the
restart. Sissoko slung in a cross that Wijnaldum got his foot too.
Unfortunately his connection was garbage and the ball was heading
wide when it hit Skrtel on the thigh and looped past Migonlet.
Moreno's disallowed strike came ten minutes later and the headds went
down afterwards. Then, at the death, Sissoko shrugged off Moreno and
galloped forward before releasing Wijnaldum to cheekily dink the ball
over Migonlet and nail the lid shut on the game. Liverpool have their
usual Europa exertions before the visit of West Brom at the weekend,
Newcastle will seek to bottle this renewed vigour and release it
again at Spurs.
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